Not looking good at the moment :(

Today, I just received my first Medicine rejection from Birmingham. I was absolutely distraught and it took a lot for me to accept it. I simply wasn't good enough - it's an indicator that I still have a lot more work to do to get to where I want to be, and perhaps an indicator that I need to do more to get ready for the medical vocation.

In addition, my Hull interview a couple of days ago kind of went belly up. I don't want to say more, but it just wasn't good enough.

There's still hope

I really do pray for an offer for Medicine (in Jesus' Name)... I basically have two lives left: Barts and St George's. I'm more likely to get an interview at St George's, but I promptly need to sort out getting references for my work experience. Also the competition for Barts has sky-rocketed this year: 800 interviews from 2600 applicants. Will my 611 (651) tarriff + 2870 UKCAT be enough?

I'm still as determined as ever to get into Medicine. Knocked down, but certainly not knocked out. Rejections only make you stronger, as long as you get back up. If anything, my devotion to get into Medicine has increased two-fold, which is kind of ironic, but utterly true.

Priorities now:

• It's the Christmas Holidays now: up the tempo to getting 41 - 45 points in the IB 
• Reflect on my two interview performances: where did I go wrong? What would I do differently if I were to do it again? How will I improve for future interviews, in order to match and potentially beat the competition? (My experiences have really brought home the extent of the competition for Medicine - the calibre is incredibly strong) Interview techniques-wise? Which qualities do I need to enhance?
• Remember the goal of getting into Medicine, but still try to enjoy myself + some social and recreational exposure with friends, and come back to equanimity 

Now, I can only move forwards. Medicine is the number one goal, I will get in, in Jesus' name.

Not feeling particularly merry at the moment, but, Merry Christmas.

Interview at Hull!

Let me start off by describing how my Birmingham interview experience was. It was actually, and very much surprisingly... alright... I gave it the best I could, and a strong performance; I sincerely hoped that I exemplified and presented the particular attributes they sought for in each station.

So I woke up at 5am on a cold 3rd December morning. The adrenaline was already beginning to rush. I was REALLY going to be having a MEDICINE INTERVIEW... an interview to enter my dream career. It was a tad unbelievable - very exciting.

I slapped on my suit, complete with a blue tie reflective of the theme colour attributed to the University of Birmingham. A two-hour car drive up the Midlands (THANKS DAD) and a sleep along the way later, we arrived at the medical school, and as we drove through, the pre-eminent, supreme Queen Elizabeth Hospital oversaw us. I pointed at it and said: 'In 2020, I'll be working there'. That was my motivation to smash the interview.

Thankfully, I had been on the open day, so that eased a bit of stress with regard to getting our way around.

So then to the interview...

I registered an hour before my inteview (well sort of an hour) - registered at 10am and was told it would begin at 11:25am. It was a bit of a nervous wait, but I just gathered my thoughts at this point and scanned over a few interview notes... and that was about it.

At 11:25am, a group of six students who had just had their interview came out of the interview area, and my group of six were then invited to proceed entry by an admission's tutor.

I said a prayer - put my trust in the Lord.

• The first station was on resilience and personal attributes. I felt I showed what I NEEDED to show. I thanked God for a good start.
• The next station was on my motivation and insight to Medicine. It was a bit of a blur, but I hopefully spat out a few things that genuinely presented my vehemence
• The next station was Ethics. It was hard, but the prep I had had got me through I believe.
• The next station was healthcare issues. Coming off the back of a tough ethics station, it was nice to have a fresh-faced, warm, welcoming, FEMALE interviewer to ease the stress. I thought that I didn't go too badly, but it was probably horrendous; who knows though... (except them) my opinion on this is rather unestablished
• The penultimate station was data interpretation. I mean, it was alright. I had a shaky start (which probably prompted the interviewer's gestures that seemed to express Why is he even here?) but I soon got into form by the end of the six minutes and that fact is probably reflected in the fact that he gave me a handshake with a smile at the end. I feel I should have done better here, though - I probably over-complicated things for myself. Hopefully they would have seen through that. Hopefully it will be appreciated, that as truly as it is the case, my quantitative reasoning skills are functional for a medical career.
• The last station was an interactive task with a fourth year medic. Well, I interacted. I showed that I am not an alien, that I can actually interact with a ANOTHER HUMAN BEING. My regret is perhaps that I didn't come with the mindset of "mature demeanour" and maybe asked a few too many questions. 

I then left the interview with a smile. I genuinely felt I had given the 48 minute interview a good crack of the whip. I thanked God for His everlasting help. My whole existence, individuality, persona, and lifelong ambition came down to this one day. That smile, I feel, was a smile of relief. 

So it's now up to them. I hear back week beginning 16/12. I pray to the Lord God almighty, who is able to do the impossible, that I am part of the 50% that will hear back with a straight-out offer (20% get straight-out rejections, 15% get put on hold and rejected, 15% get put on hold and given an offer).

So that was my experience. May I say, it was unforgettable, and it was nice to chat with some potential colleagues/medical students afterwards

Aside, I heard back about a week and a half before with an interview at Hull on 18th December! Kind of expected it, as I was guaranteed it based on my UKCAT score. But I am still looking forward to making the most of this evasive opportunity. I have already listed out my aims for this interview based on its structure (which I will detail post-interview, but its basically group discussion, medical interview, personal interview), and have learnt from this interview experience at Birmingham. I promise my performance will genuinely be good enough, and that the interview will go well, so that I can post up some valid tips in the coming days. Interview experiences are really like no other - you're there to show off and sell yourself... show why you deserve a £250,000 investment for medical training (yup, that's how much it is)... let them WANT to give you an offer, moreso than the other way round.

Also I don't think that I ever mentioned that a few days after sending off my UCAS, within the 7 day adjustment window, I changed my 5th choice from Imperial Biochemistry to UCL Biomedical Sciences, as, I feel that if ever I would go for my fifth choice (which is very unlikely, and had I even gotten it) that it would at least be better worth its money leading up to post-grad Med. It would have been a simple Biochem to Biomed switch for Imperial had they not required the BMAT. As I mentioned anyway, the back-up is a gap year; Medicine is what I want to do, through and through. I will get there :)

Will be getting a decision from the above beautiful institution this week! I pray for an offer In Jesus' Name (John 14:14 - 'Ask for anything in the Name of Jesus and it shall be done')